5 Months of Raising a Wildflower

In reality you're half a year old right now, but since these monthly reviews always cover the month prior, Momma gets to pretend that you're still 5 months old and deny the fact that you're growing as quickly as you are! I know that I say this every single month, over and over, and sound like a broken record, but you keep blossoming into more and more of a spirited, joyful, hilarious firecracker of a little girl, and I love you so much! I've found myself repeatedly saying that you look older (which, obviously would be the natural progression of things), but it's as though I am catching small glimpses of what my beautiful toddler is going to look like. I compare your current photos to your newborn ones all of the time, and though I will never forget what your face looked like when we first met, it's so satisfying getting to see you change and grow. Your cheeks are a little more full, your eyes are just as gigantic as they always have been, your hair is long enough to brush to the side now and sticks out over top of your headbands in the back, your feet now sport shoes! So much has changed, including my understanding of how a parent's love for their child works. Just when you think you can't possibly love your baby anymore than you do, YOU DO! I am reminded of this every single step of the way thanks to you, my sweet former 5 month old!

5 month stats for Lil' R.P.

Birth weight: 6 lbs, 11.5 oz, 19 inches long

4 months: Between 15-16 lbs for sure, and  too tall to possibly be the child of your father and I... 

Eye colour: beautiful greenish-blue 

Diaper size: I ran out of size 2 (else you could have continued wearing them I am sure), so we bumped you up to a more comfortable and roomie fitting size 3!

Clothing size: 3-6 AND 6-9. You're still all over the place because you're tiny, yet long. You wear cardigans that are still size 0-3, but I recently packed away anything that was 3 and under because you have so many cute outfits to wear for summer that are bigger!

Nickname: Forever my Bean and Bug, though "Bugga-Wugga" and "Peanie-Beanie" get tossed around frequently by this crazy Momma.

What Momma has observed about you at 5 months young

Over these past few weeks, you have acquired so many new skills, likes, and habits. Your favourite new "party trick" (as I call it) is to make farting sounds with your mouth, as you spit all over the place. You put so much effort into inflating your cheeks and then letting it rip, even when your mouth is full of green beans... (thank you for that, by the way). Everyone dies laughing whenever you do this (which is often), and the best part of all is that you're becoming such a little parrot, that whenever we want you to do it, all we have to do is make the noise ourselves, and you copy us! I'm sure this copy cat game will get to be a nuisance eventually, but not right now!

• On May 1st, you started being able to sit up unassisted on the floor! Gramma plopped you down to watch cartoons, and just like that, you were pretty stable! Ever since then, your mornings start with playtime on the floor, as you sit up with your toys, watching Sesame Street after your bubba. I put my pregnancy pillow around you just in case, since sometimes you get a little too excited and lose your balance. You've come so far though with your strength! I can't even believe you used to be my little spazzy noodle neck once upon a time ago!

• We keep saying that you're going to have an amazing core, because whenever we lay you down to change you, or for any reason really, you keep your head up and try to maneuver your body into a seated position. What do we expect though? You've been working out with Momma since you were a tiny fetus in my belly!

• Whenever you're being held and you start to feel sleepy, you have a tendency to nuzzle your head into the person's shoulder, almost like you're hiding. You love being super close to someone's face when you're trying to fall asleep. When you're with me, my chin has to be touching your head. At night when we're in bed, you find a way to be as close to me as possible and even latch onto my arm when you can. Usually I end up laying on my side and you're tucked right into the curve of my body like a little koala. If you're in your carseat and I physically cannot hold you, you will grab my hand and put it to your face, and fall asleep with it touching your cheek. You're so damn cuddly, but especially with me (so I ain't complaining!)

• Lately you enjoy playing in your playpen! It's great because while I use the treadmill, I plop you in your playpen beside me and you amuse yourself in a giant pile of toys. Speaking of which, because I am neurotic, I already bought your birthday gift this past month. Gramma and I made a stop at Ikea when we were out of town one afternoon, and along with your birthday gift, we got you some more plush food toys! You now have so many and they are your favourite things to whip around, from a watermelon, to a brick of cheese, a fish, little sausages, fruits and veggies. I keep saying you're going to be a chef one day, but I also think I've been watching Master Chef Junior a little too much...

• Your love for butternut squash knows no boundaries. You've liked everything you've eaten so far (except you've cried twice now when eating bananas for some reason), but you especially love squash. You will open your mouth before I've even had time to replenish your spoonful.

• You put your foot in your mouth for the first time this past month. It was only a matter of time before you realized how flexible you are.

• Before you were even born, I was given a bag of hand-me-down clothes and shoes from Justin's cousin's family. Anne generously gave you some of her favourite pieces that belonged to her daughter Maddie, and even her when she was little! One of these things was this beautiful and simple pair of red canvas shoes that have a little buckle. That very day I received them I remember starring at these shoes thinking about how goddamn adorable they were and how I could envision my future daughter wearing them so easily. Well, low and behold, you wear them now, and it's the sweetest thing ever to have a daughter of my own who I am able to dress up! They're for sure your go-to shoes, and I already dread the day you no longer fit into them!

• We call you my stalker or creeper because you're obsessed with me (and I for one love it!) You're constantly looking for me, peering over the couch, extending your neck, and when Gramma watched you while I was at Bootcamp the one night, you kept looking in the kitchen for me and had the saddest look on your face she said! Whenever you're just playing, you will glance up at me and flash me a smile and I melt. A pile of Momma mush is what I've been reduced to.

• So since it's now nicer outside, you often sport your little pink baseball cap, and good lord almighty are you ever cute in it. As if you needed to look any more like your father, rest assured that when you wear it and your ears fold over, you ARE him (and I am obsessed!)

• You have a tendency to grab at your ears often, which is also a symptom of teething, but we like to say you're checking to make sure they're still attached... Or that you're being the monkey from that app you love so much.

• Whenever I have the windows open and a breeze comes in, you are entirely mesmerized. You will quite literally fixate on the moving curtain and then occasionally throw your arms up as if you're trying to catch whatever is making it move. It's so funny watching you experience things for the very first time.

• You have worn some of thee cutest outfits I have ever seen this past month now that the weather is nice. I put you in your little red shoes and overalls just last week and nearly died. You had this white t-shirt with little gold polka dots on it underneath, and I honest to god said to Gramma, "this is what I pictured when I imagined how my daughter would dress". You're into the playsuits now and have one in every colour. We also went to another bridal shower this past month and you wore a dress that had puppies all over it! At a family BBQ, you wore a playsuit with lemons all over it, so logically I made you a lemon headband to match. Gramma also bought you these little pink Keds-like shoes with a hula-hooping pineapple on them... Like, get real. Dressing a little girl is the best!

• I have this little pink plastic activity table for you, more so for when you're a little older and can use it as a surface to colour on, or whatever you may want to do, but I sat it in front of you while you were watching Sesame Street the one morning, and you had all of your plush food on it. Well, one meltdown later and you pulled a Gordon Ramsey, throwing the table upside down and sending your food flying everywhere. I blame having binge watched Kitchen Nightmares and Hotel Hell in my final weeks of pregnancy. I'd sit there at night wondering if "this was the night".

• You've recently started lifting your shirt up and flashing us, so that's something we're going to have to stop before you're 18...

• You're now a side sleeper, and you roll back and forth during the night like crazy. It's so bizarre now that you're more mobile because I am constantly getting up to move you back into a more comfortable-looking position, or unbury your head from my armpit...

Things you absolutely love

You're still pretty much a fan of all the same things, with the addition of your plush play foods, when I sing along to a song on Sesame Street (the potato song... you laugh soooo much), when you FINALLY get your bubba after freaking out, your morning nappy, the fact that it's Summer and you can now wear minimal clothing (I'm convinced that you love being naked or just in your diaper), trying new foods, you LOVE water,  you LOVE Momma and Dada, you smile at familiar faces, and you are a big fan of people still and all of the attention you get from them!

You also love sitting up all by yourself, whether it's to watch TV, in your crib, on your change table, or even in a shopping cart! I think it's so funny to see you sitting so independently; this petite baby with a gigantic smile on her face. Taking you places has always been fun, but even more so now that you're easier to tote around and have a spirit that just don't quit!

Things you aren't so fond of...

I've said it before and I will say it again: you are a very easy-going baby (like your father). There isn't much that you dislike, except the normal things like being hangry, being over-tired, waiting for your bubba to heat up, when you spot your bubba heating up and think we are purposely withholding it from you as a form of torture, and you hate loud and sudden noises, like when I sneeze and you cry... Or when Uncle Joey makes stupid voices and you cry. You also have some strange relationship with bananas, where you eat them, but cry while doing so. All I know is that when you've had enough and get fed up over anything at all, you want Momma, and I am always here for cuddles and to make you feel better!

Eating habits

You're fantastic eater. In roughly a 24 hour period you consume 30 ounces of formula, give or take a couple. Your bottles are never less than 5 ounces a piece, and you save your gigantic bubbas for before bed and when you first wake up in the morning. You can destroy 8 ounces within those ones. You're not crazy about your cereal or rice now that you've had fruits and veggies, but you're also not as crazy about fruits as you are your vegetables. You are OBSESSED with squash and sweet potatoes! You have a hefty serving of either a fruit or veggie once a day, and so far that has been working great for us. As you near closer to being 6 months old, I've gotten braver with letting you try bits of boiled potato, or teeny tiny pieces of watermelon. You've loved both! I also let you try teaspoons of water and you were so pumped and wanted more and more. I have since bought you a Sesame Street sippy cup that we are experimenting with. You're too amused by the outside of the cup to realize that there is water inside for you to drink. I am looking forward to being able to feed you scrambled eggs, Greek yogurt, and to make you healthy and nourishing meals that you love! I'm refraining from sugar for as long as I possibly can, because I'd rather get you used to whole foods.

Sleeping pattern

You happen to be an excellent sleeper as well. Really, you're just setting the bar way too high for a future sibling. Plus, you're cuddly, and who doesn't love a cuddly baby?! You sleep through the nights (right beside me in bed, as close as you can get), from roughly 9:00 p.m. to anywhere from 7:00 to 9:00 a.m. the following morning. It is super rare that you wake up for a 3-4 a.m. feeding anymore (thank the lord). When you're ready to wake up, you usually paw at my face. You're the biggest ray of sunshine in the morning and are so so pleasant to be around. With that being said, though you may get a little fussy at night because you're tired, as soon as you have your bottle after your bath, you are out cold without putting up any sort of fight. You also nap, so I hit the baby jackpot! You have a much needed morning nap, and sometimes even an afternoon one as well. Some days you sleep for 3 hours and I don't know what to do with myself...

Playtime & Development

You love playing! I often sit you up on my bed to play because it's cushioned in case you fall backwards. You enjoy playing with things that aren't toys, like when I am folding laundry and you have to be in the pile of clothing, throwing it around. You still love your measuring spoons, buckles or belts on anything you're seated in, you love using my phone as a chew toy, you're constantly trying to get at the remote, you still work hard on your bouncy farm, and jump higher than ever in your Jolly Jumper. You can entertain yourself in your playpen while I workout, but of course you enjoy working out with Momma too!

You still aren't big on tummy-time, but have been unintentionally rolling around once you tip over. Sometimes if you end up on your tummy you just stay like that, not sure of how the heck to get back up. Then the crying ensues...

It's like you want to get up and walk YESTERDAY with how much you flail your limbs and move. Everyone says how you will be likely to walk sooner rather than later, so I guess we will see what happens! Your hand and eye coordination is spot on. You're able to press the buttons on your monkey app now and change the songs yourself. You also know how to turn your crib aquarium on and off because you smash the button with your palm. When you're in your bath, you've also become more playful. There is this little strainer that we hold above you so that the water pours down and you have started to reach for it now and interact more by splashing. I'm always so amazed over how far you're able to see now, as I will stand very far away and call your name and see you peering across the room at me, and smile. I think babies are so much smarter than they are given credit for. For example, when we put a bib on you, you KNOW that it is time for your bubba, and you get all worked up because you are impatient (like me!) I very much so also credit the notion of routine and how important it is for babies now that I've experienced it first hand.

You still don't have any teeth, but your teething symptoms have been MIA for the last little while. My guess is that within this next month we will be seeing some teeny chompers on ya!

I've had so much fun with you this past month, and having a baby your age opens up so many new windows of opportunity, like learning games like peek-a-boo, or teaching you how to clap. I'm still determined to have you say "MAMA" first, so I am constantly saying it to you. For now, all I seem to get in return are some giggles, but I will always gladly take those!

Dates & Holidays

Your Daddy and I have never been the type of parents who would rather go places without you because it's a hassle or something ridiculous, but taking you to restaurants or anywhere like that now is even more fun because you sit in your Bumbo, so happy to be right there with us! We've gone for breakfast a few times now, heat your bubba in a mug of hot water, and you're as good as gold. What's the fun of having a baby if not to bring them wherever you go?

On May 3rd, you and I rode the bus for the first time since you left my belly! Good riddance to the bus (I still hate the thing), but I had to go to Walmart, so 4 buses later and you and I were back home, both exhausted, and took a long nap. You slept for some of the bus ride, but when you weren't sleeping, you were fascinated with your surroundings just like I knew you would be. I can complain all I want about the difficulty of getting around, but taking the bus with you was just another page in The Adventures of Momma and Rowan, and I cherish them all.

On May 13th, I celebrated my very first Mother's Day! What better gift than the one of knowing that I am your Momma? You and your Dad got me the cutest card, beautiful flowers, and a Kate Spade satchel that I had told him I thought was super nice weeks before. Though the gifts were so kind, the card that he wrote from you was the best part of all. In it, he thanked me for being the best mom. To know that my husband values the job that I do, and that one day you yourself will come home from school with some handmade piece of art for me, is everything I can ever ask for. We went for breakfast as a family that morning and took Gramma with us because she is my amazing Momma! How lucky am I to be surrounded by such love? Thank you for making me a Momma, Rowan! Better yet, YOUR Momma!

You went to your very first baseball game, where we watched Uncle Joey pitch! You couldn't be more in awe if you tried. There was so much to look at, and all of the sounds and lights had you more than amused. It's funny because last summer, Gramma and I used to talk about "next year" when you would be at the games with us, and how you would almost be 6 months old! Man, how time has flown by, but how wonderful things are now that you're here.

Literally a day ago you held your own bottle and fed yourself. Okay, I get that you're practically 6 months now, but you are not 6 years old, so let Momma feed you while I still can!!!! Zia went to give you your bottle and you pulled it from her hands and held it there yourself. She thought that this was normal, but Gramma and I starred in shock. What the heck?!!! Slow your roll, Rowan!

This past long weekend was Victoria Day, and we had a family BBQ at Chris' house, where you played and napped with Matteo, spent the day outside, and saw fireworks for the first time! You were less than impressed by the sound, and it was also nearing your bed time (so you were cranky), but your eyes lit up when you saw the display of lights. I know that you're not old enough to appreciate things yet, but I am, and I do. Something as simple as a day spent at a family BBQ now holds a whole new meaning for me, as I get to do these things with my own immediate family; my husband and daughter. It truly does mean the world to me! I love our Morin Party of 3!

Lastly, from your Momma's perspective

I remember being half way through my pregnancy with you, standing in the kitchen wearing a long black summer maxi dress, as your Dad took a photo of me holding my letterboard, that read, "half way to you, baby girl!" Now, as this fifth month ends, we are half way through your first year here earth-side, and I am somewhat struggling. I find it utterly impossible not to repeat myself for the fifth month in a row about how amazing you are, how much I live to love you, or how radiant my life is now with you at it's core. The love and feelings I have for you are consistent, just continually amplified, and even that has become the norm! When you wake up tomorrow you will be 6 months old, but I want to say that I have loved you for so much longer than that, since way before I knew you; long before I ever stood in the kitchen holding that half way sign. Even when I was younger and lacking direction, I loved thinking about the idea of you one day, and though I had no idea at the time of how or when I would ever get to that point, I entrusted that I eventually would. Now I wake up every single day to this life, to what was my "end goal", and it truly is the best thing ever.

Know what else is the best thing ever? Having a daughter. We're approaching six months in, and I am loving every minute of it. I brought you with Gramma and I to get our nails done this past month. Needless to say, you were a hit at the nail salon, and you went from sitting on the chair beside me in your Bumbo, to sitting on the nail tech's lap behind the counter because they just loved you! I'm no longer surprised by people's comments about how well-behaved or happy you are. I can't seem to take you anywhere without hearing something along those lines. The best part of all, however, was captured in a candid photo that Gramma took of us two. You're sitting right beside me, both of us starring ahead, as I partake in the super girly activity of getting my nails done. It's something I always did, it's something I sometimes do with Gramma, but now it's something I will do with you too, my own darling daughter. I love the photo because it's the perfect example of how my life looks. Wherever I am, there you are right beside me. You and I, kiddo. We're a package deal! You have never been a burden, or in my way. You never will be those things either. Remember how I said that when I was younger I lacked direction? I had all kinds of plans and goals, but didn't exactly know how to make them happen. Well, you are my direction. Being your mother is my direction, and without you none of this would be real, so I will always take you along for the ride (even if that means we have to take the bus).

I'm so used to hearing people say how sad they are that their babies are growing up, and I get it, I do. Absolutely one hundred percent will I look back and long for these age or stage-specific moments that I try so hard not to take for granted right now. I know that one day when I am raising my last baby and you're this unstoppable little girl, these current memories of you will hit me like a ton of bricks right in my Momma heart, and it will so badly ache. I try to lessen the sadness that accompanies watching your baby get older by changing my perspective. I tell myself that we are growing together, because we are. With every new chapter and stage, victory and obstacle, you are growing into your beautiful self, and I am becoming more comfortable in my motherly skin. I remind myself that no matter how much time passes, or however many months old you are, you're always going to be the baby girl who made me into a Momma and taught me well. When looking at things in that light, it's damn near impossible to get sad about you living the life we gave you. Live it up, baby girl. Keep smiling, laughing, exploring, keep shining and being such a necessary light in this world. As we end these FIVE insanely wonderful months, there is only one thing left to say...

HAPPY 1/2 BIRTHDAY, ROWAN PENELOPE!

All of that love and excitement and we're only reaching the half way point?! Oh little girl, something tells me that the rest will be even better!

I love you SO much!

Love, Momma